Date Night...for one please

Do you ever have moments when you feel lonely? When you wish you had someone around that you can hang out with, laugh with, talk with.

Well, it's Saturday night, one of my first Saturday nights off from work in a while. And while I enjoy my time by myself – I'm having a moment when I kind of wish I had the company of someone I connect with. Even though I understand it's normal and natural to have these emotions, I admit, I feel guilty for feeling them. And I admit, I feel a little scared. I fear that maybe I feel lonely because I'm not at peace with myself or love myself enough. I fear that I'm being weak and feeling sorry for myself when there are bigger problems out there in the world. I fear that maybe I work and choose to live in a fast pace world so that I do not have to be still with myself. I am working on evolving myself and building spirituality and peace within so that one day, if I do have a partner, it is a choice born out of true love and not out of any need. I fear that because I feel these moments of loneliness, that maybe I'm not even close to being there.

There are two main schools of thought on being single. One is that it's just not your time and destiny will decide when or if that time will be. There's also another theory – and that is if you're single and not content with that situation, that you should be proactive and do something about it.

I'm open to relationships and love, and have tried being open to meeting different people. It's not difficult to meet a variety of people online dating sites, however, that way of meeting someone can feel contrived and not organic and thus amount to lot of pressure. You can surely go out to a bar or a club dressed to the nines and meet someone, but that can be contrived as well. Being decked in an outfit and often with an accompanying persona mixed with alcohol consumption may not be the ideal situation in meeting the "right" people. Whatever the venue it is, it's hard enough to walk enough steps to get to start to know someone and that's not even the toughest part. The most challenging part comes after the whole process and actually s connecting with each other.

I have been attracted and have even liked many people in my life, but very rarely do I really connect with someone. So this Saturday night, while the options to be entertained and be surrounded by people are indeed possible, I think I'd rather choose to have date night…for one.